Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Feelings About Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day is right around the corner! (Grunt, groan, tears, yippee). The feelings about Valentine's Day are mixed! Whether or not you have a significant other or not, everyone has his/her own feelings about the 14th of February, the day that we have come to recognize as a day of love.

I took an informal random poll of feelings about Valentine's Day, and here are some responses:

"I like it, excuse to eat extra treats!"
"I like the idea, hate the commercialism around it."
"How about making every day a valentine's day and bringing love all the time or even randomly. Why wait for one time a year to express your love for your significant other?"
Eye roll "it's kind of a fun excuse to eat chocolate and do and say something sweet for someone you love. I also love extending it to more than just a significant other. Galentine's are super fun too"
"As long as I get those chalky hearts, I am in!"
"Could take it or leave it. Too much meaning is attached to the day and people end up making themselves miserable if their expectation do not add up or if they are single."
"Waste of a day...hate it."
"Just another day for significant others to fail."

"Who doesn't love love, and chocolate? Even if single!"

The responses say it all: Valentine's Day brings up a lot of mixed feelings for individuals. It can be an awkward day at any stage of a relationship and even more uncomfortable if single. If you are in a relationship, it can be really helpful to talk with your partner about each other's expectations and feelings about the day in general. Perhaps you are quite happy to be on your own, or maybe you would rather be in a romantic relationship. What it really comes down to is how one feels loved and cared for. Gary Chapman has written several books on the languages of love. Everyone feels loved in different ways, including: acts of service, receiving gifts, physical touch, quality time, and words of affirmation. Chapman's books and website can be helpful tools to understand yours and your partners ways of feeling loved. http://www.5lovelanguages.com/ 

Whether you have a special someone to share the commercialized day of love with or you are solo, consider what you can do to show love to yourself and those you care about. Maybe you wish you had someone to buy you flowers or take you out for dinner. This year you may choose to practice loving yourself more and buy yourself flowers, candy, and/or treat yourself to a nice meal. Let Valentine's Day be a reminder to love yourself and those you care for each and every day.

If you would like to see how meeting with a counselor could be helpful for you around this time, reach out to us at Gaithersburg Counseling Center www.healingllc.com, admin@healingllc.com, or 240-274-5680.