Tips For A Good Nights Rest

Many can relate to the lethargic symptoms associated with the lack of a good nights sleep. Without a routine good nights rest the effects of sleeplessness can be felt in daily functioning at both home and work. Sleeplessness can be a factor or symptom in some mental health disorders such as depression and anxiety. There are also more significant sleep issues that could be attributed to medical conditions such as sleep apnea or insomnia. It is always encouraged to discuss any sleep related concerns with your medical and mental health providers to help determine the cause and help guide best treatment for you,

Some suggestions to support a good nights sleep:

-put phone and other electronic devices aside for 30 minutes to an hour before bedtime

-as much as possible, keep a consistent bedtime and wake time

-maintain the bed for sleep time only; if you have difficulty falling asleep, get up and do something else, like read on the couch or sweep the kitchen floors

-try calming aromatherapy, such as lavender oils in the bath or linen sprays intended for bed time use.  

-develop a night time routine (think of it like we do for children...a warm bath, glass of milk, read a chapter of a book, and lights out)

-if you are laying in bed and having difficulty falling asleep instead of counting sheep, try something that works your brain differently, like recalling the first and last name of those you attended grade school with, in alphabetical order (e.g., Alison Smith, Bob Brown, Charlie Moore)

-If you happen to be more sensitive to noise within or outside your home, consider purchasing a white noise machine or small fan to drown out any sounds that could prevent you from falling or staying asleep

- With a doctors approval, try an over the counter natural herbal remedy, such as Melatonin, Valerian, or Chamomile to help.

-If you are particularly anxious or depressed there is a likelihood that you will experience some sleep disturbance, so it may be beneficial to consult with your primary doctor or psychiatrist to discuss more medical based interventions to help you get the best rest possible

If you find yourself having difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep and would like to discuss this with a professional counselor to see how we may be of help, contact us at Gaithersburg Counseling Center at 240-274-5680, admin@healingllc.com or visit our website atwww.healingllc.com

Guide to Ending Back to School Stress!

This is a wonderful article I read on www.medicinenet.com that is applicable to this back to school season. See below:

Eight Immediate Stress-Busters

Medical Author: Melissa Conrad Stoppler, MD
Medical Editor: Jay W. Marks, MD

Most of our lives are filled with family, work, and community obligations, and at some point we feel as though we are "running on empty." Here are eight immediate stress busters to help "fill up the tank!" So take deep relaxing breath and read on.

Watch for the next instance in which you find yourself becoming annoyed or angry at something trivial or unimportant. Then practice letting go, making a conscious choice not to become angry or upset. Do not allow yourself to waste thought and energy where it isn't deserved. Effective anger management is a tried-and-true stress reducer.
Breathe slowly and deeply. Before reacting to the next stressful occurrence, take three deep breaths and release them slowly. If you have a few minutes, try out a relaxation technique such as meditation or guided imagery.
Whenever you feel overwhelmed by stress, practice speaking more slowly than usual. You'll find that you think more clearly and react more reasonably to stressful situations. Stressed people tend to speak fast and breathlessly; by slowing down your speech you'll also appear less anxious and more in control of any situation.
Jump-start an effective time management strategy. Choose one simple thing you have been putting off (e.g., returning a phone call, making a doctor's appointment), and do it immediately. Just taking care of one nagging responsibility can be energizing and can improve your attitude.
Get outdoors for a brief break. Our grandparents were right about the healing power of fresh air. Don't be deterred by foul weather or a full schedule. Even five minutes on a balcony or terrace can be rejuvenating.
Drink plenty of water and eat small, nutritious snacks. Hunger and dehydration, even before you're aware of them, can provoke aggressiveness and exacerbate feelings of anxiety and stress.
Do a quick posture check. Hold your head and shoulders upright and avoid stooping or slumping. Bad posture can lead to muscle tension, pain, and increased stress. If you're stuck at a desk most of the day, avoid repetitive strain injuries and sore muscles by making sure your workstation reflects good ergonomic design principles. There is information about ergonomics and healthy workstations to assure your station ismore ergonomically safe.
Plan something rewarding for the end of your stressful day, even if only a relaxing bath or half an hour with a good book. Put aside work, housekeeping or family concerns for a brief period before bedtime and allow yourself to fully relax. Don't spend this time planning tomorrow's schedule or doing chores you didn't get around to during the day. Remember that you need time to recharge and energize yourself. You'll be much better prepared to face another stressful day.

For extra help, feel free to visit our website at www.HealingLLC.com for more articles, or contact us at 240-274-5680 or AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com to set up an appointment for some counseling to help you through a difficult time.

Take Good Care,
Amy Hooper, LCSW-C, CEAP
Director, Another Look at Healing, LLC

HANDLING RELATIONSHIP BUMPS - by Dr. Stephanie Buehler @ The Buehler Institute

It isn't the bumps--it's how you handle them that counts.  Here are some pointers for getting past conflict and returning to harmony:  After an argument, make sure that the issue has been resolved.   What will be different in the future?  How will you make that happen? If the conflict has passed and is resolved, forgive your partner, who is after all only human--just like you.  And apologize.  Whether you started the conflict or helped it to escalate, take responsibility and say sorry.  If it is an issue that doesn't have a good solution, accept the outcome with grace. Don't use your ability to forgive to manipulate a partner or guilt trip them.    Be assertive.  Stay with "I" statements when telling your partner how you are feeling and what you want going forward. Plan to do something that fosters a feeling of togetherness.  This can be as simple as lying in spoons, or going on a date. Learn to let go and move past conflict.  Holding onto feelings of anger can foster more conflict.    Couples that are harmonious tend to have a better sex life.  The phrase is, "make love, not war," not "make war, hang onto bad feelings, and try to repair it with sex"! Article written by: Dr. Stephanie Buehler The Buehler Institute

Giving Thanks and Self Care this Holiday Season

“Gratitude is the inward feeling of kindness received. Thankfulness is the natural impulse to express that feeling. Thanksgiving is the following of that impulse.” ~ Henry Van Dyke

Each year, Thanksgiving Day reminds us to take a moment to note the things and people in our lives for which we are grateful. While we may feel gratitude for those people or things we already have in our lives, sometimes it is not only difficult to acknowledge and embrace those feelings, but to truly appreciate that for which we are thankful as well.

Gratitude is the base from which appreciation grows. That means we can be grateful for something or someone in our lives without really appreciating it. The subtle shift from gratitude to appreciation involves being more thoughtfully aware and active in reflecting on the reasons we feel grateful about something or someone. Through present moment awareness, we begin to generate feelings of appreciation.

For example, we can be grateful for having a close friendship. However, we can go further and appreciate our friend’s beauty, intelligence, and sense of humor, as well as her thoughtfulness, trustworthiness and helpfulness. In this way, we move beyond thankfulness as we consciously recognize the value and significance that our friend adds to our lives.

The next step – expressing our appreciation or “giving thanks”, in the language of the season – is often the greatest challenge.

All too often we remain silent, not showing the people we love how thankful we are to have them in our lives. This is not necessarily for lack of good intentions. Life just gets in the way or we struggle to find the words. We forget to say a simple “thank you”, or write a heartfelt note of thanks.

Thanksgiving is a time to reflect on these intentions. This is a time to ask oneself, “Am I thanking those who mean the most? Am I giving back a bit of what I have been given?” But even if we lack the ways to express our appreciation, simply bringing to mind our thankfulness and appreciation will make us feel brighter, lighter, happier, more inspired, energized, and loved this holiday season.

For more help feeling good this holiday season, counseling can help. Call or email us today for an appointment at 240-274-5680 or AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com.

Take Good Care,
Amy Hooper, LCSW-C, CEAP
Director, Another Look at Healing, LLC - Counseling Center for Women and Families

What to do when the holidays suck.

This is a wonderful article posted by a fellow therapist about taking care of yourself this holiday season - it was too good not to pass along. So, if you ever find yourself less than jolly during the holiday season, read on...

It’s the most wonderful time of the year (insert holiday tunes here)… unless you have experienced loss, trauma, neglect, moved suddenly, lost a job, separated, or divorced, experienced physical illness, volatile behaviors of a family member, substance abusing behaviors of a loved one, or mental illness.

So what happens when you or your child experiences losses and changes beyond your control and the holiday season arrives? Everyone appears so jolly and excited, and your experiences have left you feeling like you want to curl up and hibernate through the holiday season.

Here are 7 ways to honor yourself and help your child transition through difficult times during the holidays:

1. Allow yourself to express your feelings- You may feel like you don’t want to be a downer at the holiday party when people ask you how you’re doing, so you put on a happy face and pretend everything is okay, and reply “I’m fine”. Yes, opening up your emotional floodgates at a party may not be the best way to communicate your feelings; however, you can honor yourself, and your feelings and let others know “it’s been a difficult time”. Model this behavior with your children, so they know that they don’t have to mask their feelings and pretend to be happy in order to make others feel okay.

2. Listen to yourself- Take time to hear and listen to what you need. That may mean saying no thank you to invitations and spending an evening at home reading a book. You may need to quite down the busyness in order to hear what you need. You can use the art making process to ask yourself what you need right now, and then allow yourself to express that through the art. Art making can help your child to become quite and connect with their inner voice so they can honor their needs too.

3. Find ways to honor your loss- Put together a photo album honoring memories, create a memory box, use glass paint and paint a glass candleholder in honor of your experiences. Take time to be with your feelings and help your child find ways to honor and express their grief and loss.

4. Create a new story- Grief and losses often involve letting go of how things used to be. Take the time to acknowledge and honor what was, and then look at how you choose to create a new story. Get creative with a blank journal or art paper and create images and words of what you are welcoming into your life.

5. Seek out support- Being alone in your pain often amplifies the feelings of being disconnected and unsupported. Find close friends, support groups, or a therapist to help you during difficult times. You will go through a period of “new normal” where things will never be as they were before; surrounding yourself with support will help you and your child navigate this transition.

6. Let go of other people’s stuff- When you are honest with your feelings or when problems arise in your home good intentioned family and friends may jump in to offer unsolicited advice or comments. Realize that their response is their stuff; perhaps they feel uncomfortable, or they want you to feel better, and move on, or they want to fix it. Thank them for their concern, and let them know what you need, “sometimes I just need talk things through, or someone to just listen, or I just need to express that I feel upset”. If they are unable to support you in the way you would like or continue to give unsolicited advice let them know how you feel and seek out support from those who will respect your process.

7. Be gentle with yourself- You may want to push through the pain or you may become overly critical of yourself and others. Model being kind with yourself and teach your children to be compassionate with their own feelings and behaviors, this will be a life-long gift you will share with your child.

If you want help getting through the holiday season, and are interested in finding out more information about talking to a counselor, contact us at AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com or by phone 240-274-5680. For more information, visit www.HealingLLC.com for details.

Take Good Care,
Amy Hooper
Director, Another Look at Healing, Counseling and Wellness Center

Article By:
Dr. Laura Dessauer’s mission is to teach children, parents, and professionals creative ways to connect and communicate with respect and compassion, so children feel happier and more confident. As the founder of the Creativity Queen, LLC, Laura’s a Board Certified Creative Arts Therapist offering individual and family art therapy sessions and professional trainings. Visit www.thecreativityqueen.com to receive your free audio mini-course Secrets Your Kids Really Don’t Want You to Know: A Child Art Therapist Tells All (*except for the confidential stuff)
© 2011 Laura Dessauer, Creativity Queen LLC

I always overeat during the holidays, how can I stop?

1. Be Present! During the meal, pay attention to yourself. Are you filling your plate to the brim just because that’s what everyone else does? Are you drinking alcohol to “loosen up”? If so, identify what is making you feel uncomfortable and address it directly. Do you actually taste each bite, or just the first few and then you slip into robotic eating mode? Do you eat to quickly to even give yourself time to feel full?
2. Treat Yourself! Allow yourself permission to feel good both before and after the meal. If you always end up feeling so stuffed it is painfully uncomfortable, or you feel guilty afterwards, treat yourself to the gift of feeling good. Know that you can eat a wonderful meal, and even have dessert without completely filling yourself until you want to pop! Take less food – you can always go back for seconds if you are still hungry. You earned the right to feel good.
3. Enjoy Nature! Take a Walk. After the meal, get the family together or a special relative to take a walk with. This will give you some time to talk, get some fresh air, use your muscles and energize.

Let’s not forget what the holidays are really about - time for gratitude, love (for self and others), family and giving.
If you are feeling overstressed or depressed about the holidays and cannot find a way to manage all of those feelings, or if you begin to feel anxiety or depression that interferes with your life, call us today for a free consultation. You can call Amy directly at 240-274-5680 or by email at AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com. For more information, visit www.HealingLLC.com/cso for details.

Women's Rights

For the third part of our Women's Wellness Series, here is a list of women’s forgotten rights. These are reminders of what you are entitled to as a women and as a person. Many of these basic rights are often forgotten, so be sure you remind yourself, your female friends and family of what they can have. The final part of the series will include inspiring words for women.
Please share this information with the women in your life.

1. You have the right to be happy.
2. You have the right to know your worth and feel good about yourself.
3. You have the right to love your body will all of its so called "imperfections".
4. You have the right to say no. To anything.
5. You have the right to take good care of yourself.
6. You have the right to stop feeling guilty for the past and start living in the moment.
7. You have the right to have wants and needs.
8. You have the right to ask for help and get support whenever you need it.
9. You have the right to feel beautiful, loved and truly amazing.
10. You have the right to know your rights, no matter what other people say.

I would love to hear from you! Please write in with any comments or questions about women's wellness issues. All information will remain confidential if emailed to AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com. Thanks for checking in!

Take Good Care,
Amy L. Hooper
Director, Another Look at Healing, LLC

Women's Wellness Series

The next series of blogs will be focused on women's wellness issues. Women are precious, unique beings and should be treated as such. Women's issues are common, complicated and can be eased through education and self-exploration. Please share this information with the women in your life so they can start feeling better today.

The series will begin with a quiz, then move onto tips and inspiring words for women. In this Blog, we will take a quiz to see where you are on your own priority list.

Quiz: Are you on your own priority list?

1. Are you frequently putting others first; taking care of them before taking care of yourself?
2. Do you feel exhausted and depleted at the end of the day, with no energy left for you?
3. Are you feeling anxious, sad or just not happy? Are you worried you will feel like this forever?
4. Can you remember the last time you did something nice for yourself (and didn't feel guilty about it)?
5. Are you aware of and confident of your inner and outer beauty?
6. As a woman, do you know what your needs are and how to get them met?

If you have answered yes to questions 1,2 or 3 or answered no to questions 4, 5 or 6, it is time to take a look inside and make taking care of yourself a priority. Stay tuned for our next blog including information and tips for women who have trouble thinking about their own thoughts and feelings before others.

I would love to hear from you! Please write in with any comments/questions about women's wellness issues. All information will remain confidential if emailed to AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com. Thanks for checking in!

Take Good Care,
Amy L. Hooper
Director, Another Look at Healing, LLC

Holiday Survival Guide (Part III) - How to survive feelings of loneliness this holiday season?

Over the last few blog posts, we looked at why the holiday season is such a difficult time for many people. One of the most challenging parts of the holidays is that it can be a very lonely time for many people. Let’s take a look at why that is, and what can be done about it.

In this day and age, families are more spread out, more distant, and busier than ever. For many, not having family to celebrate with is difficult. Others may be single at this time, and not want to participate in holiday activities because they don’t have a partner to go with them. Meanwhile, many people do have family or friends around them, but they still feel very alone due to strained relationships or personal issues that can interfere with their enjoyment such as depression or anxiety.

What can you do when you are feeling lonely this holiday season, or throughout the year?

1. Stay connected. Invite friends to your home. It can be your single women friends, a few friends from work, or more of your acquaintances that you want to get to know better. Or, call an old friend you haven’t spoken to for a while. Talk more with your coworkers instead of rushing them out of your office. If you want to feel more connected to people this holiday season, offer to connect with them!
2. Take care of you. Treat yourself to a holiday gift, perhaps a stress relieving massage, guitar lessons, or a vacation to somewhere you have never been before. By eating right, exercising, and taking care of yourself this holiday season, you will be more likely to feel good about your self and where you are in your life.
3. Know you are not alone. During the holidays, many people share these same feelings of loneliness, isolation, sadness, confusion. It is important to understand that you are not the only one having these feelings so spend time talking to others who you think share some of the same feelings. Understand that movies and television portray the holidays and family lifestyles that are not as realistic as they may seem. In talking with others, you might be surprised by how many people feel the same way you do.
4. Appreciate what you do have. Change your focus to the wonderful things you do have in your life. It’s OK to take a friend to a holiday party or go alone, be grateful that you were invited. May be your aunt Jane’s sarcastic remarks are the only way she knows how to share her feelings, and that she really does love you.
5. Give To Others. Volunteer at a local homeless shelter or in an elementary school or nursing home. Make cookies or cards and send them out to those who are less fortunate than you. Connecting with people who give, and giving to others will allow you to be part of something larger than yourself, and to be sharing your love and your self with others who feel lonely this holiday season.

I would LOVE to hear your feedback! Send an email to AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com with any questions or comments. All communication will remain confidential.

Thanks for checking in!
–Amy L. Hooper, LGSW
Director, Another Look at Healing, LLC

Holiday Survival Guide (Part I) - Why are the holidays so stressful?

It is now autumn and with the chilling of the air comes one of the most difficult times of the year for many people. The holiday season. Thanksgiving will be here before you know it, then Chanukah and Christmas swiftly followed by New Year’s. But why is this time of year such a challenge for so many people? Let’s take a look at a few reasons…

1. Spending time (or not spending time) with your own family can be stressful.
- Do you turn back into your teenage self? Do your parents try to parent you like you're a child?
- Do you act a certain way around your family that is not the real you?

2. Spending time (or not spending time) with your in-law’s can be extremely difficult.
- Are there certain expectations?
- Do you feel judged?
- How do you decide how much time to spend with each family?

3. Travel is getting more difficult each year.
- Delayed flights.
- More cars on the road means tons of traffic.

4. Food. What you eat, when you eat, why you eat.
- Do you have eating issues that are exacerbated by being with family?
- Does it seem like the most important part of the holiday to your family, is food?


I would love to hear your feedback! Send me an email (AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com) with a question about what to do about your holidays situation. Or let me know what makes the holiday season difficult for you or the people around you. All communication will remain confidential.

Stay tuned for Part II where we will address “What can you do to not only survive, but thrive during this holiday season”.

Take Good Care,

–Amy L. Hooper, LGSW
Director, Another Look at Healing, LLC

Overworked, Under Appreciated and Stressed Out at Work?

Managing work-related stress can be particularly challenging – especially during tough economic times…

With so much downsizing and “reorganizing”, the workplace is changing and becoming more stressful than ever before. Whether you were laid off, or still working, but doing the work for the people who were laid off – managing work stressors are particularly difficult. This article will examine what work related stress looks like and what can be done to help alleviate the stress.

Work related stress affects both your professional and personal life. Work stress can spill over and affect your family at home just the same as family stress can spill over and affect your actions at work. Have you ever come home from a stressful day on the job and raised your voice at a spouse, your client or a friend when they haven’t done anything wrong? This can happen when we don’t recognize how work stress affects us and learn what we can do about it.

The following are examples of how work stress can affect you as an employee:
1. Decreased Productivity
2. Increased Absences due to illness, anxiety or fatigue
3. Decreased Attention Span/Focus
4. Increased Interpersonal Issues (fighting with boss/coworkers)
5. Tardiness

Here are examples of how work stress can affect your family and home life:
1. Increased negativity and pessimism
2. Decreased Positive Communication
3. Moodiness
4. Decreased Patience
5. Increased Fighting

So, what can we do about it? Following are some steps to take control of your work stress and get your life back in balance.

1. Separate your work and home life by setting up a boundary between them.
a. For example, you can change your cloths when you get home, or listen to calming music, or even journal about your day. Then, after your activity, recognize that work is over and family time has started. Having a specific behavior or activity can help you to put the workday behind you so you can focus on your life.
b. Turn off your work phone and email when you get home. Do not check your work phone or email until you get to work the next day. This way, you are not inviting work into your home.

2. Take care of yourself.
a. Find a hobby or activity you like to do. Playing soccer or joining a women’s group can help fill your life with meaningful, fun activities. This way, you are more than your job.
b. Talk to others when you are feeling particularly stressed. Be open about your feelings and do not bottle them up inside – or they will explode at a time when you do not want them to.

3. Use Humor – carefully.
a. Using humor can increase moral and a feeling of cohesion both at work and at home. It can also increase positive communication.
b. Smiling and laughing actually releases “feel good” chemicals in your brain that will help lift your mood if you are having a tough day.
*note* Humor can exclude and alienate if not used with caution.

4. Improve Your Time Management
a. Get Organized! If you need help, ask a friend or coworker to help you organize your workspace and your priorities. You will find yourself becoming more time efficient the more organized you are.
b. Take short breaks throughout the day – that way you are refreshed when you are working and use your time productively.
c. Set a goal and a plan for working towards them. This way you are working smarter, not harder.
d. Practice deep breathing or another relaxation technique if you find yourself overwhelmed with stress and anxiety.

5. Get Help
a. If you need help at work – talk to your boss, find a mentor, or confide in a coworker who understands and can help you to work through them.
b. If you are having difficulties at home – talk about them with your family. Opening up lines of communication will promote understanding and can lead to positive change and acceptance.
c. If you are feeling overstressed with work and cannot find a way to manage the stress, or if you begin to feel anxiety or depression that interferes with your life, call a counselor, therapist or coach in your area for help.

Stress Reduction Techniques for Everyday Practical People - One for each day this week!

Are you feeling stressed? Are you constantly worrying? Are you exhausted and just want to relax? There is a way to break this cycle and start feeling better now! Following are seven good ways to REDUCE YOUR STRESS. Try using one of these techniques for each day this week.

1. Breath. We rush around in our daily lives, between getting the kids off to school, traffic, meetings etc., we rarely “stop to smell the roses”. Perhaps this phrase is more than just to remind you to appreciate the beauty around you, but to also remember to breath! Practice deep breathing... in through your nose, and out though your mouth...
2. Practice saying “no”. Save your precious time and energy for the things you really want to do.
3. Turn off your cell phone/email/blackberry/computer/pager for some period of time each day and enjoy the quiet.
4. Don't be afraid to ask for what you need, you might get what you want!
5. Stop trying to change that which you do not control.
6. Exercise for at least 10 minutes a day. Go for a walk with your spouse, a friend, kids or pets. Park at the far side of the parking lot and walk to the building. While watching TV, get up and do a few jumping jacks or stretches, or get up and dance during the commercial breaks etc.
7. Write in a journal. Sometimes it helps just to get the feelings out of your head so you can move on. Ask yourself, “How am I feeling” and “What am I thinking”.
   

Practice these seven techniques for one week and email me to let me know if you notice a difference! You can email Amy Hooper at AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com.

Or, for more helpful information, contact Another Look at Healing, LLC – A Counseling and Wellness Center today. Call our office at 240-274-5680 or email us at AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com.

Stress, what is it? Finally an explanation!

Everyone has stress, but what is it really? Stress is the body’s normal, natural reaction to a perceived threat. Thousands of years ago, the perceived threat was a saber tooth tiger who was headed towards your cave to attack you. In that situation, your body releases certain chemicals such as adrenaline, which makes your heart pump blood faster, your muscles tense and your breathing become rapid and shallow. All of your senses become more alert so you can make the quick decision whether to fight or to flee.

Today, your body’s chemical stress reaction is the same as it was years ago, only the threats have change. Now, instead of a life threatening saber tooth tiger, the stressors are the car that cuts you off in traffic, or your boss calling you in for a meeting. As a result the tension has no release and your stress response builds. Each time you get “stressed out,” those chemicals are released and for many people, these chemicals are almost constantly streaming through your body. This constant stress can lead to physical, emotional and behavioral problems.

Examples of Physical Problems:
- Headaches/Backaches
- Fatigue
- Insomnia
- Stomach Pain

Examples of Emotional Problems:
- Depressed
- Anxious
- Fearful
- Irritated Often

Examples of Behavioral Problems:
- Overeating
- Feeling unmotivated to work
- Isolating from friends and loved ones
- Increased irritability and feeling overwhelmed

All of these symptoms can strongly impact your functioning in your daily life. If you are suffering from any of these issues, and want the symptoms to go away so you can get some relief, there is a way to feel better. Contact Another Look at Healing, LLC – A Counseling and Wellness Center today for more information at www.HealingLLC.com. Call our office at 240-274-5680 or email us at AnotherLook@HealingLLC.com.